THE WORLD’S LARGEST BOUNCY FORTRESS
Yes we rebrand Murrayfield as the world’s largest bouncy fortress.Or maybe castle? A castle is a fortress and we have one bang in the middle of our capital. Fortress works better though.
This idea only works for the SRU.
And the Scottish footy teams too if they want it (also on the up).
If other countries try to pinch it we’ll shame them.
‘Same old England, always stealing (light bulb, penicillin, er…the telephone) Same old England, always losing’
Thanks Christo and Jeanne-Claude for the inspo.
What if we transformed the Bouncy Fortress into a massive rave after the game? Attract a younger audience into matches? Players and fans get to boogie together. What if we got all the best up and coming Scottish electronica talent like LaLa, Wallace etc to play too. Let’s mix up people’s interests: expose the game to music-heads and the music to rugby-heads. Everyone wins.
ANOTHER PR IDEA
DEFLOWERED BY SCOTLAND
Becomes our national anthem for the day.Yes All Blacks, we’re going to pop your losing cherry up here. Lol.
Think this idea is funnier if we play it really seriously rather than creepy bagpipe wandering hands wrong’un gif. It will probably never see the light of day (officially).
BUT, what we if handed out flyers with the lyrics to fans guerilla marketing style on their way in to the stadium? Try and stop us ;)
Tee-fucking-hee
ANOTHER PR IDEA
CHEER-ACTIVATED TURNSTILES
If you can’t cheer at 90 decibels you’re not coming in.
This one is at least moderately buyable 😂
ANOTHER PR IDEA
GO BLUE FOR THE SRU
Turn up in the nastiest, most freezing Scottish conditions for your team and show your blue fingers at participating vendors for a free coffee.
ANOTHER PR IDEA
DYE 4 SCOTLAND
Yes, we’ll offer to tie dye your bright white England shirt to be the colours of Scotland so you can celebrate with us when we beat you (again 🥱)
No one will do this but it’s PR-able nonetheless.
FINALLY
What if we put those kinetic energy-generating pads under the pitch and all over the stadium….
World’s first stadium powered by bouncy players and fans….
Acht bend yer noggin doonwards
Free Idea number 2 for scotland team
I’m going to teach you all to play the drums - but just on the double bass pedal
You will be able to go RRLLRRLL
RLRRLRLLRLRRLRLLRLRRLRLLRLRRLRLLRLRRLRLLRLRR
And the other way too
RRL LLR RRL LLR
All players will be able to go off both feet fucking quickly
Even you Zander (time to get a head start. Catch Zander will be the first game)
That will fucking terrify other teams. You will create so much space for each other and we will post you all foot-drumming together in perfect time to Flower of Scotland as a Warcry.
What fun.